Thursday, November 26, 2009

Would this be considered an "emotionally abusive" relationship?

About a year ago, I had a relationship with a young man who seemed nice at first- but then as things went further, I found out that he was not only extremely controlling, but also very jealous and very possessive even though I didn't flirt with other men nor cheat on him. There were times when he would threaten to leave me when I wouldn't sleep with him. He wasn't pleased about the fact that I loved dressing up (he never had to pay for anything, I buy my own clothing and pay for my own beauty products) and always wanted me to dress very casually and not even fix my hair (I am NOT kidding!) whenever he wanted to see me. There were times when he would call me, moaning and nearly crying when the subject of me leaving him would come up. He even cheated on me. I have dated some men after that (just casually) and this man and I are already broken up, but I still feel this sense of pain, brokenness, and a much lower sense of self-esteem.



Would this be considered an "emotionally abusive" relationship?

this young man got you all twisted up cause im sure at first, you were like, oh well maybe he is just protective, right? then it got worse and worse till you felt that he would probably do worse than "break up" with you if you left, you finally got tired and left...... well feeling like your hurting is normal. feeling a little "lower" or like **** is normal. you obviously cared about him. but you need to remember why you left. and why it obviously wasnt meant to be. regret, and sadness are all feelings anyone gets when they break up or have things that need grieving. anyway hope this helped, oh and to answer your first question, YES, that would be considered an emotionally abusive relationship.



Would this be considered an "emotionally abusive" relationship?

Thats just ridiculous. Not worth it



Would this be considered an "emotionally abusive" relationship?

Yes, it would.



Abuse comes in many forms and degrees. He doesn't sound like the sort of bad guy one wishes one could throw into a jail along with the wife-beaters. But the relationship sounds abusive even so.



Would this be considered an "emotionally abusive" relationship?

Lose the loser! You shouldn't have to go through that.



Would this be considered an "emotionally abusive" relationship?

I would hope that you could do better than with this person.



Would this be considered an "emotionally abusive" relationship?

Good riddens to bad boys. Sounds like you did the right thing breaking up with him. Dress up. It will raise your self esteem. Flirt, be flirted with, enjoy life.



good luck.



Would this be considered an "emotionally abusive" relationship?

u already know what type of guy he was then y u care abt him...if he is gone out of you are life...thank god for it...such crazy guy is gone.....who wants to control your life..........don't feel bad just learn from your mistake don't repeat them..enjoy you are life and dress yourself u like.......be happy......



Would this be considered an "emotionally abusive" relationship?

Trust me I've been there and it will only get worse. Leave him. No man should make you feel bad about yourself nor are they worth it. Get out while you can. Find someone who makes you happy. Good Luck.



Would this be considered an "emotionally abusive" relationship?

Abuse? Yeah. Low form, but effective anyway. I feel your pain. 10 Years worth. Glad you recognized it early enough to get out. And that you had the courage to. Don't beat yourself up. It's ok to grieve some, but don't let the past hold you back. Just make it clear next time that you do not intend to tolerate abuse of ANY kind.



Would this be considered an "emotionally abusive" relationship?

GOOD thing you are not with him anymore. I had a relationship like that, and it was very hard for me to get out. He was extremely manipulative, controlling, abusive, made me feel like nothing, etc. The best thing you did was leave him. Now you can look back and learn from the relationship. Why did you get into such a relationship, and why did you go along with all his nonsense for as long as you did? These are important questions you need to answer about yourself, mostly so that you can avoid similar relationships in the future.



Second, realize that everything he said/did to you was about HIM, and not you. You did nothing wrong - it's that he has mental problems, obvious from what you've written so far. He was overly jealous because of his own lack of self-esteem, and he tried to feel better by making you feel low. It is classic behavior of a guy with 'issues'.



In any case, it sounds like you stopped the relationship before it really got out of hand, which shows your inner strength. I hope you can get him out of your mind and heal quickly.



Would this be considered an "emotionally abusive" relationship?

There's a great book I read, "Ditch the Jerk", which doesn't really mean the advice is always to dump a man. It's a very clear look at 4 levels of abusiveness. Even if you're no longer together, as I am also no longer with the "jerk" in question, it's still a nice read to put things in perpsective. You already seem to know the answer to your question. The book will help you to look at him dispassionately, through their explanations of behaviors like his. With this perspective, you should get some relief from your pain, brokenness and lower sense of self-esteem. The book is a quick, easy read too



Best wishes and good luck



Would this be considered an "emotionally abusive" relationship?

.You need to stay far away from him-Self esteem would be a poor excuse to let somebody abuse If you need to question this then you definitely are abused. Would you like him to bash your head in the wall the next time you wear make up-Is that thrilling?Do you like people stealing from you that's what he is doing but YOU ALLOW IT-SELF ESTEEM-I don't think so STUPIDITY more like it. Dump him unless you like people to abuse you-Nobody deserves this from a relationship-PICK yourself up before your family needs to read about you in the paper. CHOOSE WISELY . I know this is hard to hear but you really need the wake up call.

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